Zane: A Scrooged Christmas Read online

  Mike calls after us. "Bruce Wayne is welcome to hang at our house if you need us to dog sit. You know, Margie loves him."

  I laugh. "I’ll let you know. Thanks, Brother."

  4

  When Batman and I arrive at Blake’s, I sit in my truck and study the establishment. It hasn’t changed much in the eight years since high school and memories of hanging out after football games with my homies always hit me. We had a lot of fun times here. It is still a hangout for teenagers, but on Christmas Eve it’s dead. Blake, the owner, and I are friends. He gives me a discount on pizza because I’m a cop, and I ride by here after the football games whether or not I’m on duty to make sure there isn’t anything bad going down. I rarely go inside to eat though. I typically call my order in and have it delivered to my door.

  But tonight, I’m meeting the hot chick here. I grin. I’m a devious bastard. Blake will surely recognize her and give up her identity to me without her ever knowing I didn’t know.

  I unbuckle, open my door and exit the truck, stuff my gun in the back of my pants, hook the leash on Bruce Wayne and head in.

  The parking lot is empty except for a red Ford Fusion parked at the door. That must be her car. I glance in the windows looking for a name or a clue, but nothing. I make sure to check the front for a name tag too, but it’s a bust.

  When we enter the front door, Blake shouts from the rear. "No dogs!"

  "Bah Humbug, you old bastard!" I shout back as we come in anyway. Scanning the place out of habit, there is no one here. Then I see her seeing in the corner booth where the lights are dim. The one I used to sit at with my bros.

  "Zane!" Blake smiles as he comes out of the kitchen, wiping his hands in a towel. He speaks to Bruce Wayne. "You know I’m making an exception for you because it’s Christmas and who your partner is here." He sticks his hand out and I shake it. "To what do I owe this inside visit?"

  "I’m meeting her." I nod my head at the beautiful brunette and she waves.

  "Oh! Sweet! A date with destiny."

  I laugh, "I guess you know her."

  He smiles. "She’s a special one, that one. Bloomed late, like a rose, but wow, did she ever bloom. She’s doing alright for her self too." Then he asks me, "Your usual?"

  "Sure, and I’ll take a carry out too. I don’t intend to leave my pad for a couple of days once I make it to bed."

  He laughs and I know he knows I intend to tap that sweet thing. "I’ll put in a few extras slices incase you have overnight company." He winks and turns to walk away.

  "Hey man," He turns back to face me, so I walk up and lean in close to whisper. "Do you know her?"

  He nods, then grins. "You don’t?"

  "No, but I think I’m supposed to."

  His grin spreads even wider. "Yes, you are." Then he spins around and swaggers off leaving me no closer to knowing who she is than when I walked in.

  "Dammit," I say under my breath. I showed my cards and he won’t help me now. He’ll enjoy the game of "guess who" from a distance.

  His voice calls from the kitchen. "Come here, Pup. I have a Christmas hambone you can enjoy."

  I unleash Bruce Wayne and his nose leads him back to his treat. Then I walk over to the dark corner where the beautiful mystery woman sits waiting.

  I start to slide into the seat across from her, but she pats the space beside her. I slide in and put my arm casually across the back. If she wants to be close, I’m going to give her every opportunity.

  "Have you ordered?" I ask her.

  "No, I was waiting for you."

  Damn, her voice does something to me. "Do you know what you’ll have?"

  "Meat-Lovers. Same as you."

  This girl remembers my pizza preference? Who the fuck is she? She’s familiar, but I can’t place her. My brain is reeling, trying to find the connection.

  "So tell me how you came to dance at the best nightclub in Vegas?" I ask, knowing if I’m leading the questions putting my detective skills to good use, I’ll discover her identity.

  "They held tryouts a couple of years ago and I walked in, auditioned, and made the cut. How did you decide to be a policeman? I was totally surprised when I recognized you tonight in uniform. I would never have guessed being a cop would be your career choice. You were such a badass in school."

  I laugh and push a piece of stray hair out of her face, wanting to see her beautiful eyes in the dim light. "Sweetheart, cops are badasses."

  She smirks and says, "I’ll give you that."

  I hear my own voice in my head respond with 'you’ll give me that, alright. In a couple hours, I’ll be owning that.' But instead, I tell her. "Being a cop has its advantages. We have excellent benefits."

  "Really? What kind of benefits does being a cop have?"

  I take her chin and turn her face to mine. "I’m talking the kind of benefits that gets a date with a beautiful woman on Christmas Eve."

  "Oh, those benefits!" She licks her lips and the wetness glistens.

  I see myself pouring oil over her prone body later and I lean down for a kiss. When my lips touch hers, the softness is like velvet and the taste of her is sweeter than honey. An emotional connection rushes in unguarded and flies past my barriers. I know I should withdraw my kiss and regroup, but she is just too perfect to pull away from. My tongue slides inside to touch hers, but I hear Blake approaching and she gently pushes us apart.

  5

  I open my eyes to stare into her caramel colored ones again for a brief second before she looks at him, thanking him for the brew. He has delivered two Coors Light in the bottle. She pulls one to her and pushes the other to me, then she looks at me again.

  I smile at her and ask, "So what else have you been up to?"

  "Oh, not much. I work all the time."

  "Single?" I give her a sideways grin. "I’m hoping so."

  "Yes, I’m single." She laughs, catches the insinuation and responds. "No, I’m not cheating on anyone. I wouldn’t do that. That’s just wrong." Then she frowns and asks, "You?"

  "I’m single too," I smirk, "and I wouldn’t cheat either. I’ve been on the receiving end and it is definitely wrong."

  Her words send me back there. I haven’t thought about it in years. I caught my college roommate fucking my girlfriend in the Frat house at the Christmas party. They were too drunk to even care. The betrayal was unacceptable to me and when I drug them out by their hair, she was kicking and screaming. Several dudes tried to intervene and help her. That’s the night I perfected my "Bah Humbug, Motherfuckers" delivery. I kicked ass and took no prisoners. I smirk and tip the bottle to draw the brew into my mouth. I notice her eyes are watching me.

  "I heard about that. I’m sorry." She says softly. Her tone touches something inside me and when I set the bottle down, it’s with less pain than when I lifted it.

  "Ever married?" I ask her.

  "No," She shakes her head, then lifts her beer, takes a drink, and asks, "Kids?"

  "No, I don’t have any kids. Do you?"

  "No, I don’t either." She smiles and the softness of it sends a spark of warmth through me.

  Blake comes out and tells us. "Your pizza is coming up in about 10 minutes." He grins at her. "It is good to see you. It’s been a while since you were in here."

  "Thanks, Blake." She says. "I’ve missed your special sauce. No one makes it like you do."

  "How’s Bruce Wayne doing on that hambone?" I ask him.

  "He’s working it over pretty good."

  We laugh.

  I tilt my head and lift my eyebrow. "He’s a rescue, you know. I picked him out of a lineup at the pound. He’s had to fend for himself for a while. I don’t know that I’d leave him alone in the kitchen."

  He cuts his eyes in that direction and says, "Oh lord." Then takes off at slight jog back to it.

  "Really?" She asks.

  "No, not really," I tell her.

  She laughs hard at my practical joke and the sound is so familiar to me. I study her face as she tilts her head b
ack and releases the volume freely. This girl loves to laugh. Then it hits me. I realize who she is. She isn’t anyone I dated before. As a matter of fact, she isn’t anyone I hung with in school. But I remember her. I remember that laugh. I could never forget that laugh. Her laughter wafting in my window late at night when we were children helped me stay sane at a time in my life when hatred was an everyday feeling shoved down my throat. Her laughter had a magical tone that made me feel like life wasn’t so bad after all. This mysterious beautiful woman is Lanky Laura.

  Suddenly, I want to kiss her again and feel her velvet, sweetness reach down inside me. She’s the only person in the world who I confided in and she never once betrayed me. I reach for her hand and I stroke it with my thumb. She gives me a squeeze and it’s strong and confident. My dick thumps wanting to fell that grip crush him and never let him go.

  "Laura," I tell her softly. "I’m sorry I left you behind."

  Her eyes look into mine and I see that same hunger in them for me, that I have for her. "It’s okay, Zane. We were kids and we weren’t in charge. You couldn’t help what happened."

  I look down at the hand, remembering. Then I puff air out of my nose disapprovingly and tell her. "I could have done more."

  She laughs. "Like refuse to move?"

  I laugh. "No, like get on my bicycle and ride back to see you."

  She grins. "I would have flipped out and run away from you."

  "Really?" I chuckle. "Was I that bad?"

  "No! You were that good." She grins a sideways grin. "I was too shy to even go there in my mind during the day."

  I grin sideways at her too. "But at night?"

  "At night I belonged to you."

  "I like the way that sounds."

  She grins.

  "I should have at least found you in school."

  "We ran in different circles."

  "I should have…."

  "Zane, don’t. It’s not necessary."

  "Yeah, but…."

  "I’m just as much to blame. I let you go and if you would have ridden over or found me in school, I would have pushed you away. You were too much for me."

  She’s right. When I saw her in school, she was shy, awkward, and in need of a makeover in a bad way; and I was the jock on campus. I grin remembering, then look back. "We were just kids."

  "Yes, we were just kids."

  "I wonder how things would have turned out if I had never moved away?"

  She laughs. "I used to imagine that very thing."

  I laugh too. "I would have been crawling through your window." I look down at her tits. "Those girls would have forced me to find you and be bad with you."

  She looks down, blushing, but she laughs.

  I slip my hand over her ear and tilt her face back. My lips find hers and as we kiss getting reacquainted, her sweet, softness surges into the depths of my soul as flashes of pictures race across my eyelids. My mind having located those past conversations, opens the floodgates of memories and my mouth possesses hers, letting her know that I have no intention of leaving her ever again. She was my best friend forever. Her hand lays on top of mine and she returns my kiss matching my passion.

  Blake clears his throat as he sets the pizza down. "I hate to interrupt this part of the reunion, but your food is ready."

  When I let her go, I feel mushy and high at the same time.

  6

  While we eat, we catch up on all the things we’ve been doing since I moved across town. Like all old friends, time hasn’t eroded our bond. We laugh and laugh and laugh. I had no idea how locked away and bitter I had become. But watching her laughing and snorting at my antics and jokes, takes me to a place of peacefulness, and I can’t believe how human I feel again.

  When the pizza is devoured, she raises her beer and toasts us. "Here is to correcting the wrongs in life, Zane."

  I touch her bottle at the neck with mine and say, "Hear. Hear, Laura." After we drink that toast, I offer one of my own. "Here is to BFF’s."

  Her eyebrows raise in surprise and she grins. "Best Friends Forever?"

  "Well, that too, but I was thinking more like becoming fucking friends."

  She dies laughing and says, "Spoken like the badass I remember." She clinks the neck of her bottle against mine, and with her eyes shining brightly as the stars, she says just before her lips pucker over the head, making cock rise up with expectations of a Christmas filled with magic. "Here’s to both."

  As we drink the toast, the door to the pizza joint opens and the little jingle bells hanging on the handle ring out. I hear Blake call from the back. "Merry Christmas to you, but I’m sorry. It’s past closing and I’m shutting down the ovens."

  As I lower my beer, I look to see who walked in this late at night and the hair on the back of my neck stands straight up. A rush of adrenaline kicks me in the ass, but my training takes over, and I set my drink down quietly. Turning calmly to face Laura, I hear hers clank roughly against the table as it slips from her fingers. She looks like she’s seen a ghost. Her eyes are open wide. She’s scared shitless. I cut my eyes back to the four men who are wearing all black and have hoodies covering their heads and at least one has a weapon.

  Luckily, they haven’t heard or seen us. The dim light and corner booth are to our advantage. Immediately, I move to shield her, wrapping my arms around her trembling body. I lean down to whisper in her ear, "Shhh. Lay down." Then I force her over backward and lay on top of her. Keeping her from moving and drawing their attention, I pull my gun out of my waistband. I feel her arms slip around me and she squeezes me tight in a hug that holds me secure while I myself. I lift my face to look into hers. She gives me a sweet peck and a wink and the look in her eyes blows me away, she knows her life is in my hands and she trusts me with it. Knowing how dangerous this situation is, yet knowing how important her trust is to me, my mouth covers hers and I give her a kiss filled with a tongue that tastes all of her and promises to take care of her while I listen to what the thugs are saying.

  They are discussing how much cash could be in the back office in the safe. Knowing I can’t let them get that far inside, I let her lips go, give her the same reassuring wink she gave me and she smiles. She knows that she means more to me than anyone else ever has and I will do whatever it takes to protect her. What we had as children was magical and what we can have as adults can be too. I was teasing her about becoming fucking friends, but I meant it! She is my best friend and I want her forever.

  I flip the safety off my gun and put my fingers to her lips. She nods, opens her arms, and lays quiet on the seat under me. I roll off her and crouch down behind the booth. When I lift my head and peek around it, the thugs have advanced to the counter.

  Blake calls from inside the kitchen. "We’re closing early for Christmas. I’m not taking orders."

  "Come out, old man. We don’t want your pizza, but we do want your dough." The tall one in the back calls out, and the others laugh.

  I can tell from the slight slur in his speech that he’s either drunk or high. The man in front reaches up and scratches his arm at the bend of his elbow and I know he, at least, is needing a heroin fix. Chances are they are all stoned.

  Blake is quiet in the kitchen. I know he keeps a shotgun in the back office for just this sort of thing, but I’m concerned. Bruce Wayne will need to turn into Batman to get the perp, but giving his command from this distance and without the proper hand signal, I don’t want him turning on Blake instead. Dogs, like humans, are either born with a hero mode or they are not. Although he never flinched in training and I know he will respond to my command, in this situation he needs to help identify the real bad guy. Hopefully, the hambone will have left no doubt who he is supposed to attack.

  I start to stand but freeze. Blake looms in the door with his apron on, but thankfully, no gun is visible. "I’m closed. You boys need to leave."

  "Not without a Christmas present."

  "I’m fresh out of gifts," Blake says.

  "Surprise us th
en," he says and waves his gun at the cash register. Apparently, he is the only one packing heat. That’s good.

  "Merry Christmas then," Blake laughs and steps aside.

  Batman stands behind him growling with a heavy stream of drool dripping off his fangs. His lips are curled all the way up and he looks ferocious. There is no doubt he will attack them. Hero he is then.

  "HOLY FUCK!"

  They all scream and panic ensues. Two of them immediately bolt for the door, one falls down on his knees in fear for his life and face plants on the ground, whimpering, covering his head, but the leader raises his gun.

  EVERYTHING GRINDS INTO SLOW MOTION.

  The leader aims his gun right at Batman.

  I command Batman softly, but firmly. "Get the maggot!"

  Blake pulls a shotgun out from behind his back.

  Batman leaps, clearing the barrier.

  I jump to my feet and scream at the top of my lungs.

  "BAH HUMBUG, MOTHERFUCKER!"

  The sound of gunfire fills the little pizza parlor.

  7

  My booming delivery of "BAH HUMBUG, MOTHERFUCKER" has the exact effect I intended. It causes the gunman to jump, startled, and start a flinching spin in my direction. I pull the trigger of my gun and his arm drops just before his gun fires, discharges a bullet harmlessly into the floor. A growing wet stain on his pants leg tells me I hit my mark. He crumbles to the ground as Batman arrives.

  Batman immediately bites the robber's forearm, making him drop the weapon and scream a blood-curdling cry, which only makes Batman shakes his arm back and forth.

  I arrive next and kick the weapon out of reach. Take the robber the rest of the way down, command Batman to release him, kneel on his neck to keep him disabled, pat him down quickly, snatch my belt from my pants because I don’t have my handcuffs and my belt is the best thing I have right now to restrict his movements, tell Laura, "Call 911 and tell them Sergeant Scrooge is on an active crime scene, a robbery, shots were fired, send a bus, and he and batman are in pursuit of two assailants who have fled on foot."